Austin Improv

"Well... I guess that was our Shawshank Redemption." - The Shawshank Redemption

"Who will put an end to these terrible Star Wars?" - Star Wars

"Did you hear about the Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford" - The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford

"Well, I guess our affair turned into a real Fatal Attraction." - The Shawshank Redemption

Well played.

"I am Spartacus" - Spartacus

"Jackson Pollock" - Pollock

"This is 'There Will be Blood'" - director's commentary, There Will Be Blood

"I guess that's the man who went up a hill and came down a mountain."

"I'd like to take his Face Off...because I am Nicholas Cage" - Con Air

"Dude, where's my car?" "Where's your car, dude?" - Titanic

"I guess we're all just a little lady in the water sometimes" - Juice

TexasImprovMassacre wrote:"I guess we're all just a little lady in the water sometimes" - Juice

ha ha

"If it's not too much trouble, I'd also like you to bring me the head of Alfredo Garcia." - Fellowship of the Ring

"Denny Crane" - ST: The Wrath of Kahn

"For never was a story of more woe
Than this of Juliet and her Romeo."
- Romeo & Juliet

"Love keeps her in the air when she oughta fall down." - Serenity

"Whenever I get gloomy with the state of the world, I think about the arrivals gate at Heathrow Airport. General opinion's starting to make out that we live in a world of hatred and greed, but I don't see that. It seems to me that love is everywhere. Often it's not particularly dignified or newsworthy, but it's always there - fathers and sons, mothers and daughters, husbands and wives, boyfriends, girlfriends, old friends. When the planes hit the Twin Towers, as far as I know none of the phone calls from the people on board were messages of hate or revenge - they were all messages of love. If you look for it, I've got a sneaky feeling you'll find that love actually is all around" -House of a Thousand Corpses

"Dick, balls, dick, balls, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck." - Jaws

"What are you guys...untouchable or something?" - The Untouchables

"Japanese submarine slammed two torpedoes into our side, chief. It was comin' back, from the island of Tinian Delady, just delivered the bomb. The Hiroshima bomb. Eleven hundred men went into the water. Vessel went down in twelve minutes. Didn't see the first shark for about a half an hour. Tiger. Thirteen footer. You know, you know that when you're in the water, chief? You tell by lookin' from the dorsal to the tail. Well, we didn't know. `Cause our bomb mission had been so secret, no distress signal had been sent. Huh huh. They didn't even list us overdue for a week. Very first light, chief. The sharks come cruisin'. So we formed ourselves into tight groups. You know it's... kinda like `ol squares in battle like a, you see on a calendar, like the battle of Waterloo. And the idea was, the shark would go for nearest man and then he'd start poundin' and hollerin' and screamin' and sometimes the shark would go away. Sometimes he wouldn't go away. Sometimes that shark, he looks right into you. Right into your eyes. You know the thing about a shark, he's got...lifeless eyes, black eyes, like a doll's eye. When he comes at ya, doesn't seem to be livin'. Until he bites ya and those black eyes roll over white. And then, ah then you hear that terrible high pitch screamin' and the ocean turns red and spite of all the poundin' and the hollerin' they all come in and rip you to pieces.

Y'know by the end of that first dawn, lost a hundred men! I don't know how many sharks, maybe a thousand! I don't know how many men, they averaged six an hour. On Thursday mornin' chief, I bumped into a friend of mine, Herbie Robinson from Cleveland. Baseball player, boson's mate. I thought he was asleep, reached over to wake him up. Bobbed up and down in the water, just like a kinda top. Up ended. Well... he'd been bitten in half below the waist. Noon the fifth day, Mr. Hooper, a Lockheed Ventura saw us, he swung in low and he saw us. He'd a young pilot, a lot younger than Mr. Hooper, anyway he saw us and come in low. And three hours later a big fat PBY comes down and start to pick us up. You know that was the time I was most frightened? Waitin' for my turn. I'll never put on a lifejacket again. So, eleven hundred men went in the water, three hundred and sixteen men come out, the sharks ttook the rest, June the 29, 1945. Anyway, we delivered the bomb."

- Seinfeld the Movie

I'm calling BULLSHIT!


There WAS NO directors commentary on There Will Blood!


*Though, if there were, I would really hope it was entirely silent until the very end before the credits and Paul Thomas Anderson would simply say "See? I told you""


oh, and my favorite movie quote is "Of all the curious cases I've investigated, Mr. Button, yours is truly the most boring" - Chinatown

"Look, up in the sky, it's Superman!"
- Batman Begins

"I want milk."
- Milk

"The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the iniquities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men. Blessed is he, who in the name of charity and good will, shepherds the weak through the valley of darkness, for he is truly his brother's keeper and the finder of lost children. And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who would attempt to poison and destroy my brothers. And you will know my name is the Lord when I lay my vengeance upon thee. "

- The Passion of the Christ