Austin Improv

There were a lot of big acts that came through town for Fun Fun Fun Fest. Another incredible year and lineup. HOWEVER this is about my only bad experience during 3 years at the festival.

My friend Jace bumped into me and said, "Man that whole standup show I saw was great. Except for that one lady. She rubbed her boobs on people in the audience & dragged a man on stage and sat on his face."


I passively nodded, imagining some run of the mill alt-comic empowering herself with the microphone.


Little did I know that there would be a repeat performance that night-- the ultimate eternal hell of standup-- and I would be sitting in the front row.


This was a smaller venue. I had invited a female friend and was excited she'd come to see comedy for the first time. But my friend's warning rang through my ears and it dawned on me the headliner was the same aggressive alt-comic.

I never saw it coming. It was only when this seven foot tall confident woman was staring into my eyes from the stage that I realized the terror I had exposed myself to. My worst personal nightmare.


I now have living proof that crowds should not be listened to. I know for a damned fact that crowds are monsters.


This woman stormed onstage belting out a song with the raw force & power of the singer Meatloaf. She towered over everyone. She warned us we would be terrified and that some pussies would try to leave the show. It was a challenge.

It was a familiar energy-- as though a predatory animal in the wild was considering me for supper. Bear with me-- you weren't there. Because of what Jace told me-- I maintained eye contact and tried to show no fear. I knew she was coming from a place of insecurity. But she had the microphone and I did not. She was leading this audience down a frightening garden path.


There was no escape. The mob laughed and cheered as Bridget walked into the crowd and fondled the breasts of men and women alike. People showed true faces of disgust-- but moments later the victims came back around to laughing along.

Why were the victims laughing along with the watchers?

Because humans fear being left out. I saw terrified face after terrified face come to terms with being in a nightmarish situation. The crowd were sadists.

Right now I'm even questioning "if it's cool" to post about my discomfort. But I know what I saw. The audience laughed and cheered as this performer used the microphone to focus her aggression on the unwitting members of the audience.

You think a crowd knows what it wants? A crowd might have a mind of its own-- but it is completely independent of the individuals that it consists of.


I was groped. I had my head jerked so that it was throbbing for 20 minutes. Boobs shoved in my face. She sat on my lap while I showed no sign of playing along. And at no point did the crowd check in with my personal experience. Or the others who were violated. Everyone was spellbound by the leader in the room.

From my experience with this one "artist" I've come to the very unfortunate conclusion that I witnessed a similar crowd dynamic that led the Germans to fall under Nazi rule.

On an individual basis, nobody wants to feel left out. "If these folks are OK with it, then I'm OK with it." Sure relating this comedy show to prewar Germany is somewhat of an exaggeration. I saw nothing like the types of violations that Germans witnessed. But I saw the same crowd dynamic. Everyone in the room was spellbound under an alpha leader.

And due to her confidence she could have gotten away with anything. Individuals were terrified while the mob was lulled into a form of submission.

At the end of the show, the crowd cheered Bridget on as she demanded a man lie down on stage. She hovered above him and spat champagne in his mouth. She disrobed down to her panties. Then she sat on his face. The crowd loved it.

I've confirmed my belief that the mob knows nothing. They are complacent and dangerous. The type of energy that comes from a crowd witnessing victims being abused is downright terrifying to watch. As long as people are laughing along they'll let anything happen.


Terrifying y'all. Never "listen to the audience" if this is where it leads. Crowds are monsters and the mob knows nothing.



And please please please never use the microphone to imprison or oppress.

Yiiiiikes.

She chose men each time, right?

What you're describing is a pretty sad outgrowth of patriarchal values. It's wonderful when women manage to cast off the expected gender roles of demure, ladylike, sexualized but not sexual, etc. However, in mimicking male predatory sexuality, they are doing no one any favors. And as for men being put in that position, our own gender roles tell us that we're not victims. Ever. Especially of a woman. The audience likely didn't even regard what was happening as a violation.

It was not exclusively men that she was using for her act. She grabbed my friend's breast as well as mine. Yes, the majority of violations were performed on men.

She appeared to size up people who she thought would be willing. Not necessarily people who would be "into it." Does that make sense? She had a good eye for those who would willingly submit to her desires.


I agree that most people probably didn't see the acts as violations. Afterward I escaped and told my friends outside what a horrible experience I had during the show.


"I felt trapped and terrified."

"What are you talking about? That show was hilarious."

"Did you get touched?"

"No. But I think she did a good job only touching people who wanted to be touched."

"Dude, I was touched and was pissed the whole time. She was dominating people and counting on our silence."

"It was hilarious."



The fact that one man seemed OK with it somehow carried over and meant that everyone violated was OK with it. But he wasn't acting bravely. He was submitting to her. I would describe the experience I witnessed as being very similar to hypnosis.

Heads up Austin!!!!


This performer is in town. Her name is Bridgett. Avoid at all costs unless you are a sociologist and you want to see how groups of mammals will allow physical abuse to take place under the guise of entertainment. In that case attend and keep your eyes on the audience.

The vibe may vary from show to show but consider yourself warned of the herd dynamic at play here.

Avoid or hide in the back of the auditorium. She'll use your ticket against you. This show is ultimate weakness under the guise of strength.