Austin Improv

"I'm pooping a snake right now."

"Yes, I'm on Xanax, why do you ask?"

"Do you have to take your snake out in public?"

majcher wrote:http://modernarthur.com/blog/christwhatanasshole.html

I'm amazed this works as well as it does...

http://contest.newyorker.com/CaptionCon ... ny-caption

acrouch wrote:

http://contest.newyorker.com/CaptionCon ... ny-caption

I remember when they'd only steal your radio.....

"This is why this town needs parking meters."

I've been through the desert on a horse with no skin.

"My poor Mustang!?!"

or

"How long was I in there?"

or

"What are you grinning at?"

or

"What am I gonna tell the Mrs."

or

"I can't take you anywhere!"

or

"This will definitely affect the horse power.."

"A 15 minute call could save you 15%...."

"Maybe there's a HORSEMAX in town..."

"Valet???... this is not my horse..."

"My Little Boney Pony..."

"...you really should eat something"

"Any good rib joints in this here town?"

"They told me to leave this town on the horse I rode in on.... Yeah thats YOU!

"Can you believe they ran out of whiskey?"

"This is a 1/2 horse town now."

"Anorexia is treatable Buster!"


"I've got a bone to pick with you Mr."

"you're on my beat"

"Not again!"

Well, I guess that heathcare deal took awhile.

Oh, for the love of Pete. How is the apocalypse supposed to be a SURPRISE when two through four get here late?!