take a punchline, leave a set-up

Maggie Maye · Post by **Maggie Maye** » February 26th, 2009, 1:24 am

Because he heard they were giving it away for free over there.

Why did Gary Coleman switch to Verizon?

Brian Boyko · Post by **Brian Boyko** » February 26th, 2009, 11:03 am

Thought that "weekend minutes" were one night stands with little people.

There are 180 ways to kill a man. The most painful is...

arthursimone · Post by **arthursimone** » February 26th, 2009, 11:34 am

Birth.

Why did Sarah Palin go into a Bed, Bath, and Beyond?

Lants · Post by **Lants** » February 26th, 2009, 4:18 pm

Because she's a dumb cunt... that needed towels.

What did the priest say to Mickey Rourke?

vine311 · Post by **vine311** » February 26th, 2009, 4:24 pm

I loved you in "Sin City".

What do Bea Arthur, Michael Jackson and a pogo-stick have in common?

EmilyBee · Post by **EmilyBee** » February 26th, 2009, 5:12 pm

They all look fabulous encrusted in cubic zirconias.

Who do you call when your toilet's exploding, the cat is barfing, and your wireless router just won't work?

TexasImprovMassacre · February 26th, 2009, 9:49 pm

Obama, baby.

What time is it in Russia?

valetoile · Post by **valetoile** » February 26th, 2009, 10:38 pm

Tool Time!

What's a blind man's favorite color?

arthursimone · Post by **arthursimone** » February 27th, 2009, 1:41 am

He has no favorite color, he got hit by a car and is dead.

Who shot JFK?

valetoile · Post by **valetoile** » February 27th, 2009, 8:08 am

JFK. It was all a camera trick.

What did the mouse say to the grape?

EmilyBee · Post by **EmilyBee** » February 27th, 2009, 9:58 am

Let's go sunbathing. I have this great oatmeal cookie I'd like you to meet...

What did the pope say to the matador?

Lindsey · Post by **Lindsey** » February 27th, 2009, 11:05 am

I'd forgive you, but you're full of bull.

One egg says to another-

Belinda · Post by **Belinda** » February 27th, 2009, 11:46 am

Care to beat off together and make nog?

What would happen if you mixed a brown paper bag, duct tape and a issue of Disney Today?

Lants · Post by **Lants** » February 27th, 2009, 11:59 am

Sperm bank would get an early deposit

Why did Jerry Seinfeld get so mad at the usher?

Curtis + computer · February 27th, 2009, 1:18 pm

Because the cinema had stopped showing Bee Movie more than a year ago.

Knock-knock.
Who's there?
Archibald.
Archibald who?