I'm such a woman that I...
Improvisors behaving badly.
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- mpbrockman Offline
- Posts: 2734
- Joined: April 12th, 2007, 6:26 pm
- Location: ATX
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I'm such a woman that I...
I won't respond (not being one), but am rather curious to see what responses the flip side of the "I'm such a man..." post gets.
"He who is not a misanthrope at age forty can never have loved mankind" -Nicolas de Chamfort
www.perfectlyreasonabledreams.com
http://www.facebook.com/mpbrockman
www.perfectlyreasonabledreams.com
http://www.facebook.com/mpbrockman
... know the exact location of every food item in an HEB.
... can cook Thirty Minute Brownies in 10 minutes flat.
... once created an award-winning four-course meal using only a can of Sterno and a toaster oven.
... can sweat in twelve floral scents ranging from Almond to Zinnia.
... can woo men with my sensuous and provocative trombone playing.
... still receive fan mail from jilted suitors.
... can hurl a compressed powder compact at small moving objects with deadly accuracy.
... once single-handedly defended a small Amazonian orphanage from a horde of ferocious army ants, using only a garden hoe and a urine sample.
... can cook Thirty Minute Brownies in 10 minutes flat.
... once created an award-winning four-course meal using only a can of Sterno and a toaster oven.
... can sweat in twelve floral scents ranging from Almond to Zinnia.
... can woo men with my sensuous and provocative trombone playing.
... still receive fan mail from jilted suitors.
... can hurl a compressed powder compact at small moving objects with deadly accuracy.
... once single-handedly defended a small Amazonian orphanage from a horde of ferocious army ants, using only a garden hoe and a urine sample.
What is to give light must endure burning. - Viktor Frankl
- TexasImprovMassacre Offline
- Posts: 2858
- Joined: August 11th, 2006, 4:37 am
- Location: Austin, TX
- Contact:
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- mpbrockman Offline
- Posts: 2734
- Joined: April 12th, 2007, 6:26 pm
- Location: ATX
- Contact:
Can you do night-blooming jasmine?Kathy Rose Center wrote:... can sweat in twelve floral scents ranging from Almond to Zinnia.
"He who is not a misanthrope at age forty can never have loved mankind" -Nicolas de Chamfort
www.perfectlyreasonabledreams.com
http://www.facebook.com/mpbrockman
www.perfectlyreasonabledreams.com
http://www.facebook.com/mpbrockman
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- DollarBill Offline
- Posts: 1282
- Joined: March 7th, 2006, 12:57 pm
- Location: Chicago, IL
- Contact:
My sister baked a cake on a propane coleman camping stove once. That was while she was living in the woods building her own house. No joke - http://www.lauraashe.com/may/laura.htmlKathy Rose Center wrote: ... once created an award-winning four-course meal using only a can of Sterno and a toaster oven.
They call me Dollar Bill 'cause I always make sense.
I'm such a woman that I...
...give people around me an estrogen contact high.
...make grown men cry when I pass them on a bicycle.
...can cross stitch battling, bloody dragons.
...am mistress of flavors, lady of scents, duchess of delicious... a general goddess of gastronomy... over fire and in the kitchen. And I take the time in between stirring to kick some serious ass in Fallout 3.
...can multitask until it hurts (you).
...have bested numerous "personal massagers".
...could easily withstand the pain of an elephant trampling my midsection (cause I do it every month, anyway).
...have trained my breasts to do tricks.
...can pack a car within an inch of its life and still be able to tell you where everything in it is.
...give people around me an estrogen contact high.
...make grown men cry when I pass them on a bicycle.
...can cross stitch battling, bloody dragons.
...am mistress of flavors, lady of scents, duchess of delicious... a general goddess of gastronomy... over fire and in the kitchen. And I take the time in between stirring to kick some serious ass in Fallout 3.
...can multitask until it hurts (you).
...have bested numerous "personal massagers".
...could easily withstand the pain of an elephant trampling my midsection (cause I do it every month, anyway).
...have trained my breasts to do tricks.
...can pack a car within an inch of its life and still be able to tell you where everything in it is.
Mairzy Doats and Doazy Doats and Little Lamzy Divey
Thank you, Cody. I'm also such a woman that I ...TexasImprovMassacre wrote:...enjoy kathy rose center bits so much they make me laff.
... can crush grapes with a withering glance.
... translate ethnic slurs for Cuban refugees.
... advise Martha Stewart on the best floral designs for mortifying occasions.
... provide biofeedback training for bears trying to sh*t in the woods.
... use cats as oven mitts. And they love it.
... designed a full line of boutique dental floss.
... wax my armpits with used chewing gum - preferably, Double Bubble.
... transcribed Le Nozze di Figaro into a bluegrass opera for twelve kazoos and a saw.
... designed a Kegel exerciser for Scottish ewes.
... can make any man feel like a throbbing volcano of Steve McQueen's primordial essence. (See: night-blooming jasmine)
... recycle Kleenex tissues, unless they contain primordial essence, in which case they are used to make paper mache chastity belts for nuns who are fooling themselves.
What is to give light must endure burning. - Viktor Frankl
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- kaci_beeler Offline
- Posts: 2151
- Joined: September 4th, 2005, 10:27 pm
- Location: Austin, TX
- Contact:
...am in the majority gender participating in the arts world, and in the minority gender represented in museums.
...am in the majority gender participating in the theater arts world, and in the minority gender in repertory companies.
...am a minority in the improv and comedy world.
...am not thought of as a threat.
...follow tradition even when I feel it may be wrong, because I don't want to make people uncomfortable.
...fear aging.
...cover my flaws as best I am able.
...settle, because it's the easiest thing to do.
...am in the majority gender participating in the theater arts world, and in the minority gender in repertory companies.
...am a minority in the improv and comedy world.
...am not thought of as a threat.
...follow tradition even when I feel it may be wrong, because I don't want to make people uncomfortable.
...fear aging.
...cover my flaws as best I am able.
...settle, because it's the easiest thing to do.