Instructions

Spots · Post by **Spots** » August 30th, 2012, 11:51 am

Step 9: Vomit 15 different ways.

sara farr · Post by **sara farr** » August 30th, 2012, 3:20 pm

Step 10: Climb erect ladder

Rev. Jordan T. Maxwell · August 30th, 2012, 3:35 pm

Step 11: Resist giggling at the word "erect" so that it comes out as a half snort.

hujhax · Post by **hujhax** » August 30th, 2012, 3:41 pm

Step 12: Erect a ladder.

--
peter rogers @ home | http://hujhax.livejournal.com

You never want to endanger your actors, for two reasons:
1. it's not nice,
2. it will slow you down.
-- Josh Becker, on directing stunts

Ryan Hill · Post by **Ryan Hill** » August 30th, 2012, 4:25 pm

The Dreaded Step 13

Elect a radder.

A radder what, you ask? That's entirely up to you. Just put it up for a vote and make sure the result is something radder than the last.

jillybee72 · Post by **jillybee72** » September 1st, 2012, 2:58 am

Step 14

Watch as many episodes of "Black Adder" as you can locate. To save Peter the work, I will mention the caveat that "Mr Bean" is not a suitable replacement. Should "Black Adder" be unavailable, request a transcript from the BBC.

hujhax · Post by **hujhax** » September 1st, 2012, 4:43 am

Thanks Jill!

--
peter rogers @ home | http://hujhax.livejournal.com

One day we'll all look back at this and laugh, just before they light the bonfire beneath the stakes we're tied to.
-- Bob Apthorpe

sara farr · Post by **sara farr** » September 2nd, 2012, 2:24 am

Step 15: watch this video

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=besnRD2uN9c[/youtube]

jillybee72 · Post by **jillybee72** » September 2nd, 2012, 3:31 pm

Step 16. Think of a wallet you've seen before that belonged to someone other than yourself.

Rev. Jordan T. Maxwell · September 3rd, 2012, 2:49 pm

Step 17: Mix a shade of green that's somewhere between happy and Mozart.

EmilyBee · Post by **EmilyBee** » September 3rd, 2012, 4:29 pm

Step 18: Write down "Step 1", "Step 2" ... "Step 18" on a piece of paper, cut out* each "Step" and put all the paper scraps into a bag**. Mix paper shards in bag*** and then draw three. Perform those three steps, in the order of the pull, then proceed with Step 19.

*Should there be no scissors, attempt to secure a pocket knife. SHould no pocket knife be available, tearing the paper is permissable, but only if you first run a quartile widdershins dance obligato, underscored by the greenest Mozart you can find.

**A bag may lso be a pouch, knapsack, satchel, purse, or sac. Please do avoid using a tote or duffel, but you may, if you see fit, pull an empty soul from the saddest creature you can find, then fill it. A most amenable solution to their problem and yours!

***Less of a melding of the unique portions of papier and more a joyful dance, with partners joining, parting, pairing, rustling among one another, a verbal cotillion.

Ryan Hill · Post by **Ryan Hill** » September 4th, 2012, 1:19 am

Step 19: Realize intently and with awe that it is entirely possible (though highly unlikely) to get caught in an infinite Step 18 loop. Say to yourself, "Well sure, Emily created it," then move on to step 20.

hujhax · Post by **hujhax** » September 4th, 2012, 1:45 am

Step 20: Build a time machine. Take it back in time to just prior to Step 12. Loan time machine to Step-12!you, so that S12Y can, in turn, go back to just before Step 10, thus "erecting a ladder" that gets subsequently used in step 10. Caveat: be sure to instruct S12Y to return back to his/her own time afterwards & return the time machine to you. Then, use the time machine to return to this spot in the timeline.

Additional caveat: preserve causality, and avoid grandfather paradoxes at all costs.

--
peter rogers @ home | http://hujhax.livejournal.com

One day we'll all look back at this and laugh, just before they light the bonfire beneath the stakes we're tied to.
-- Bob Apthorpe

Rev. Jordan T. Maxwell · September 4th, 2012, 9:26 am

Step 21: Prevent Hitler from winning World War II and causing this nightmare we are all currently living in.

...well done!

sara farr · Post by **sara farr** » September 4th, 2012, 12:24 pm

Step 22: Using the fabric of time and your Bedazzler gun, create a physical reality from the mental construct of the wallet you've held in your imagination. Color it using the Happy-Mozart green.