Best Show Lines 2012

B. Tribe · Post by **B. Tribe** » July 19th, 2012, 10:24 pm

Bad Boys, 7/19/12

Byron: What do you want to do with your life?

Danny: I wanna be a robot with a movie screen and show Ferris Beuller's Day Off on a crappy spaceship!

ALSO LATER

Danny (as the previously mentioned robot): Now you will watch the movie 'Ferris Beuller's Day Off'. (realizes that he has to act out a movie he's never seen) Oh-ho-ho, shit.

Brad Hawkins · Post by **Brad Hawkins** » July 26th, 2012, 3:05 pm

From the Cubbies show, Improv Fest Oklahoma, 7/21/12:

First guy: Have you seen 12 Monkeys?
Second guy: You mean... like, all at once? Or ever?

(any help identifying these guys would be great)

Post by **happywaffle** » July 27th, 2012, 8:51 am

Kosher Bacon rehearsal, 7/23. Ellen Pittsford is a tattoo artist, Travis found some of her artwork.

T: "Wow, that's an amazing unicorn."
E: "Thanks. I'm the Lisa Frank of skin."

Rev. Jordan T. Maxwell · July 30th, 2012, 10:03 am

"You're a mystisexual."
-Kacey Samiee
Indigo Shift, 7/28/2012

Ruby W. · Post by **Ruby W.** » August 1st, 2012, 8:09 pm

8/01/12

While teaching 9-13 year olds in the Youth Program. We were working on story spine.

Kid #1 - Once upon a time there was a pig with no name
Kid #2 - And everyday he searched for someone who loved him and could tell him his name
Kid #3 - Until one day he found someone who loved him
Kid #4 - And because of that, he ran away from the farm and went to his new owner's house
Kid #5 - But because of that, he got mud all over the new owner and the new owner fainted.
Quinn (Gloria's kid) - So the pig ran out and got some oink-ment to rub on his new owner.
Kid #7 - Until finally he rubbed the oink-ment on his owner and saved him.
Kid #8 - And ever since that day the pig and his new owner lived happily together in their new home.

so. perfectly. awesome.

Post by **happywaffle** » August 1st, 2012, 8:17 pm

That is better than 99% of story spines I've ever witnessed.

Ryan Hill · Post by **Ryan Hill** » August 2nd, 2012, 11:41 am

happywaffle wrote:That is better than 99% of story spines I've ever witnessed.

Kids are natural improvisers.

Gloria · Post by **Gloria** » August 2nd, 2012, 11:43 am

I have never been more proud.

Rev. Jordan T. Maxwell · August 2nd, 2012, 11:50 am

oink-ment...ha! watch your back, Craig Kotfas!

kaci_beeler · Post by **kaci_beeler** » August 2nd, 2012, 11:55 am

Ruby W. wrote:8/01/12

While teaching 9-13 year olds in the Youth Program. We were working on story spine.

Kid #1 - Once upon a time there was a pig with no name
Kid #2 - And everyday he searched for someone who loved him and could tell him his name
Kid #3 - Until one day he found someone who loved him
Kid #4 - And because of that, he ran away from the farm and went to his new owner's house
Kid #5 - But because of that, he got mud all over the new owner and the new owner fainted.
Quinn (Gloria's kid) - So the pig ran out and got some oink-ment to rub on his new owner.
Kid #7 - Until finally he rubbed the oink-ment on his owner and saved him.
Kid #8 - And ever since that day the pig and his new owner lived happily together in their new home.

so. perfectly. awesome.

I'm dying to know if this pig ever got a name and what was that name?

His name should be oink-ment.

Ruby W. · Post by **Ruby W.** » August 2nd, 2012, 3:07 pm

kaci_beeler wrote:
Ruby W. wrote:8/01/12

While teaching 9-13 year olds in the Youth Program. We were working on story spine.

Kid #1 - Once upon a time there was a pig with no name
Kid #2 - And everyday he searched for someone who loved him and could tell him his name
Kid #3 - Until one day he found someone who loved him
Kid #4 - And because of that, he ran away from the farm and went to his new owner's house
Kid #5 - But because of that, he got mud all over the new owner and the new owner fainted.
Quinn (Gloria's kid) - So the pig ran out and got some oink-ment to rub on his new owner.
Kid #7 - Until finally he rubbed the oink-ment on his owner and saved him.
Kid #8 - And ever since that day the pig and his new owner lived happily together in their new home.

so. perfectly. awesome.
I'm dying to know if this pig ever got a name and what was that name?

His name should be oink-ment.

nope! even after all of that, no name!

Post by **happywaffle** » August 3rd, 2012, 10:06 am

"So… there's the ocean. And deep under the ocean, there's this rock. And if you lift up the rock, there's a treasure chest. …And on the other side of the world, there's this guy reading a book. …What book is he reading?"

--Ruby, getting a suggestion as Mitchell Deane in last night's Free Fringe

Ryan Austin · Post by **Ryan Austin** » August 5th, 2012, 9:10 pm

Fancy Pants Aug 3rd

Andrew Robinson doing Demon Voice

"Pour Blood on yourself"
Does so.
"Fit yourself in the exhaust pipe!"
Does so.
"What comes next?"
"Possess the car!"
"Ummmmm.....I am the car...fear me?"
"Run over that kid!"
Does so.
"What comes next?"
"POSSESS THE KID!"

Rev. Jordan T. Maxwell · August 6th, 2012, 8:47 am

"If you're ever in the water with a crocodile and a hippo, FEAR THE HIPPO!"
-Kyle Traughber

"Will I learn to fly through a sheer act of will or as part of my physiology?"
-Erika May (as a baby ant)

Pocketful of Posies
8/4/2012

davealley2 · Post by **davealley2** » August 6th, 2012, 9:19 am

Ryan Austin wrote:Fancy Pants Aug 3rd

Andrew Robinson doing Demon Voice

"Pour Blood on yourself"
Does so.
"Fit yourself in the exhaust pipe!"
Does so.
"What comes next?"
"Possess the car!"
"Ummmmm.....I am the car...fear me?"
"Run over that kid!"
Does so.
"What comes next?"
"POSSESS THE KID!"

Just WOW.